Motherhood: The Good and the Hard
This week, I’ve felt so overwhelmed and inadequate as a mama. I’ve been shorter-tempered and easily angered. I’ve used tv as a distraction much more than I wish to admit. I’ve lacked creativity and excitement in engaging with Little Man. Some days I’ve flat out sucked at this mama life. That’s not to say it’s all been bad. We’ve had many cuddles and kisses, trips to the park and quality time spent together. There’s still been much good in this mama life. I think I’m trying to say that I’ve sucked when it comes to the ideal image I have in my head of what motherhood should look like. I’ve not lived up to the pressure I’ve put on myself. I’ve not accounted for the fact that I’m human and some days are just gonna be rough. Perfectionism is a struggle for me, and always has been. Though I’ve grown greatly in that area, I still struggle with it. This week hasn’t been truly bad, but I’ve felt like a failure quite a lot. I love this mama life. I love my little boy more than life itself. I wouldn’t trade any of this for anything in the world, but I’m still learning. I’m still learning how to be a gentle parent. I’m still learning how to balance being a wife, mama, doing freelance work, blogging...and still having time to be me. I’m still learning how to engage my quickly growing toddler and how to make time together as quality as possible. I’m still learning so much. And I’m learning that it’s okay! It’s okay that I’m not perfect and make mistakes. It’s okay to still be learning. If we aren’t learning and growing as parents, then we aren’t being good parents either. So I want to encourage you parents out there who have maybe had a difficult week and are struggling with feelings of failure and inadequacy. You aren’t alone! We all feel that sometimes. It doesn’t mean you’re a bad parent. Instead, it means that you’re human, and you’re learning and growing in this wild journey of parenthood. And as long as you keep loving, trying, learning and growing, you’re doing a great job!